Paolo has done Mia's hair in a very bizarre style
Mia Thermopolis: I look like a moose.
Paolo: But a beautiful moose. Make all the boy moose go 'WHAAAAA.'
Queen Clarisse Renaldi: Clarisse comes into the kitchen and sits down, after Mia stomped on Nicholas's foot, after learning that he was the one who wanted to steal her throne. Mia is eating ice cream As your queen I simply cannot condone it... as your grandmother, I say right on!
Joe: Viscount, you may not be aware of what my job entails as the Royal Head of Security. My job is to protect the crown. To make sure no harm comes to the crown. To step in when someone toys with the crown's emotions.
Viscount Mabrey: I think the entire country understands how well you cater for the crown's emotions.
Joe: pause If you hurt my girl, you will answer directly to me, and whatever crimes I commit against you, remember, I have diplomatic immunity in 46 countries, including Puerto Rico.
Viscount Mabrey: Sir, you will find that the word "fear" is not in my vocabulary!
Joe: Perhaps... but it's in your eyes.
Queen Clarisse Renaldi: A princess never chases a chicken.
Security Guard Lionel: Princess Mia! Princess Mia!
Mia Thermopolis: [Reluctantly] Yes?
Security Guard Lionel: Nothing, I'm just supposed to watch you.
Lilly Moscovitz: [singing to herself while watching Mia and Andrew play badminton] They're smitten, while playing badminton. Where's my kitten?
Mia Thermopolis: I loathe you!
Nicholas Devereaux: I loathe YOU!
Mia Thermopolis: I loathed you FIRST!
Nicholas Devereaux: [kisses Mia]
Mia Thermopolis: [while watching a list of possible husbands, a picture of Prince William appears] Yes! Oh yes! I, I, I absolutely accept!
Charlotte Kutaway: Prince William. He's not eligible because he's in line for his own crown.
Mia Thermopolis: [Disappointed] Oh.
Joe: If he's not eligible, why is he included in these pictures?
Charlotte Kutaway: I just love to look at him.
Queen Clarisse Renaldi: Me too.
Mia Thermopolis: Mmm-hmm.
Joe: Your majesty!
Queen Clarisse Renaldi: Next?
Charlotte Kutaway: Antoine Suisson of Paris. Plays the harp. No title, but good family.
Lilly Moscovitz: What about the title "husband?"
Mia Thermopolis: Yeah, he's cute.
Joe: His boyfriend thinks he's handsome, also.
Mia and Lilly together: Right on.
Queen Clarisse Renaldi: No matter. Put him on all the invitation lists, he's a divine dancer.
Andrew Jacoby: She's going to be a handful, isn't she?
Queen Clarisse Renaldi: You'll never be bored, Andrew.
Captain Kip Kelly: Yelling in Military fashion at the parade Identify, Mustang personnel!
Lilly Moscovitz: Why do you talk like that?
Captain Kip Kelly: Still yelling I'm... Captain Kip Kelly of the Royal Guard!
Lilly Moscovitz: What if we all talked like that?
Yelling
Lilly Moscovitz: Lilly Moscovitz, best friend of Princess Mia, *riding* in the 'Stang!
Nicholas Devereaux: I'm Nick. Viscount Mabrey's nephew.
Andrew Jacoby: Ah, the chap who's trying to stage the palace coup. I'm Andrew Jacoby. Nice to meet you.
Lilly Moscovitz: Thrusting out her hand to shake his Lilly Moscovitz, official best friend of future queen. I don't like you.
Nicholas Devereaux: Pleasure.
Joe: [to Mia] Love does things for reasons that reason cannot understand.
Nicholas Devereaux: Tell me one of your desires.
Mia Thermopolis: Tell me a secret.
Nicholas Devereaux: Isn't that the same thing?
Mia Thermopolis: Everyone knows your desires. No one knows whats inside your heart.
Mia Thermopolis: I have my own mall!
Andrew Jacoby: Mia, Tommorow we will say our "I do's", we will be man and wife, and you will do great things as queen of Genovia!
[Mia kisses Andrew on the Cheek]
Mia Thermopolis: Thank You
Mia Thermopolis: Oh my god, Your here!
Lilly Moscovitz: I'm here!
Mia Thermopolis: In Genovia!
Lilly Moscovitz: Yeah
Mia Thermopolis: In my closet!
Lilly Moscovitz: Yeah
Mia Thermopolis: And you're blonde!
Lilly Moscovitz: And I'm Blonde!
Mia Thermopolis: Oh my god, I have to tell you something!
Lilly Moscovitz: What?
Mia Thermopolis: I'm getting married!
Lilly Moscovitz: To whom?
Mia Thermopolis: I don't know yet.
Queen Clarisse Renaldi: Did you hear that?
Charlotte Kutaway: Not if you didn't want me to.
Queen Clarisse Renaldi: I know it's short notice, but you were all dressed.
Joe: With this ring, I thee - finally - wed.
Queen Clarisse Renaldi: Dear Joseph, am I too late to ask you to accept my hand in marriage?
Joe: I thought you'd never ask.
Security Guard Shades: The Sparrow is taking off.
Charlotte Kutaway: The Eagle is flying for the last time.
Mia Thermopolis: Just because I didn't get my fairytale ending doesn't mean you shouldn't.
Nicholas Devereaux: If I may be so bold, I would like an audience with your Highness.
Mia Thermopolis: motions for him to go ahead What is your dilemma, young man?
Nicholas Devereaux: You are, in fact. I'm in love with the Queen-to-be, and I am enquiring if she loves me too.
Mia Thermopolis: Do you have a chicken for my table?
Nicholas Devereaux: No. No, my kitchen is out of chickens.
Lady's Maid Brigitta: Your Highness, a strange woman came in and said that she wanted to hide in your closet, so I let her.
Security Guard Lionel: Your Majesty, I would gladly take a bullet for you.
Queen Clarisse Renaldi: Oh, how brave. Most interns don't even want to fetch me my tea.
Nicholas Devereaux: Rapunzel, Rapunzel, with hair so fine. Come out your window, climb down the vine.
Mia Thermopolis: The feat you ask, dear sir, isn't easy. And I won't respond to that line, it's far too cheesy.
Mia leaps onto the bed
Lady's Maid Brigitte: We just made the bed.
Mia Thermopolis: This is so cool
Joe: I would kneel if it weren't for my knee replacement.
Queen Clarisse Renaldi: teaching Mia the art of the fan; Mia is making faces behind her fan Are you sassing your grandmother?
Mia Thermopolis: I would never sass you grandma.
Mia Thermopolis: I thought you said you never slide?
Queen Clarisse Renaldi: Oh I don't, but I have done a lot of flying in my day.
Queen Clarisse Renaldi: SHUT UP!